I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Randomize
