i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize