so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
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