I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
Randomize
