i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
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