We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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