i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
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