I bet he comes in French.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
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