The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
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