Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
