its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
