Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Randomize
