Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
Life is so much better after having sex.
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
My vagina is officially offended.
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