Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
