Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
Randomize