I smell stomach acid.
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
