My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
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