This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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