My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Randomize
