South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Randomize