Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
I will be naked everywhere
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
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