Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
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