My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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