Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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