im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
my shit smells like andre
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
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