well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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