We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Randomize
