No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
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