I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
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