He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Randomize