Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
