You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
