Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
Randomize