even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize
