sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Randomize
