farters have to be the big spoon...
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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