She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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