Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Randomize
