Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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