the new term for farting is butt boxing.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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