sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Randomize
