We named our party play list daddy issues
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
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