Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
