what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
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