Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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