is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
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