This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Randomize
