yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Randomize