i barfeds in our rink
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
