You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
